Empty

All these facts and all these lies that I'm letting sink into my mind
I see the the stars but will I really ever make it that far?
It wasn't easy to ust let you slip away from me.
I often remember the late night talks we would have all the questions I would ask and how I always told you I'd be something you'd be proud of.
I often thought that you would live forever but i know that dream was short lived at least now i know that you are with others in the same place and someday i will get to be with you again but untill then i will keep my promise to you and achieve  the goals i have set for my future.
Turns out that noone can replace you...

Rewind

Trying to go back to the place I once knew, wanna run till Im back to the place i grew from I want to go back to warn the "little me" about the future that was set up for us . Im not the joyous child I once was.I would rewind and watch my life over stop and reflect on the best memories before she left to watch over us.Those final days were rough, but I know that now I have to strive on and make something out of nothing make sure my roots stay planted. 

  

FOR YOU TO REMEMBER: 

I know eveything may not be the way u want it to be, but Im glad that all the crap that has happened in ur life has lead u to us. We aren't the brady bunch but we will stick together no matter what!  I can tell u from the bottom of my heart that I love u enough for all of the people who have let u down, or will continue to, Im not good at expressing feelings, so I don't say these things enough, but u kids are my pride and joy! I may not seem happy sometimes,but I hope u guys know that depite it I truly am happy because Im surrounded by the loves of my life. Thank u for being u, and for how much u help out. It  has really helped me out and I really appreciate it and most of all, u. xoxox

Lives

I used to be the type of girl that thought the worse of herself. I used to hang out with people I thought were better then me to help me feel better. I used to feel like an outcast in my own family, not really having someone my age to hang out with and talk. I would get asked by my family if I was ok and how were things going, I'd answer by say that things were fine and great just to get them off my back. I used to smile but I was broken inside, I turned to music for my escape, I would pretend that there was a whole other world where I fit in and music was a thing that made everything happy. Like just a connection with everything and everyone through music.I wanted to change for the better and now that im growing up and seeing how cruel this world really is. It seems that music is something that brings us closer the music we listen to tells the truth and the lives of others that we might not understand.  

paper heart

Sometimes i hold my paper heart in my hand .Trying to hold onto the plan. I try and carry the weight on my shoulders but yet your pictures still haunt me Now I hold the memories of us in my little paper heart .

Facts

 So this is just a little more for you guys to get to know me.

1. I'll be 17 in 2 months 
2. I have 3 siblings
3. My favorite type of movies are comedies
4. I've wanted to start a youtube channel for a while 
5. I'm weird 
6. I know that what I put in my blog doesnt make sense at times 
7. I'm Hispanic and Japanese 
8. I will be a junior this coming school year 
9. I'm a bookworm honestly I love to read
10. I dont trust people fairly easily y6